The fourth commandment is “Honour your father and your mother.” This commandment commends us to love, respect, obey, and help our parents. It forbids contempt, disrespect, disobedience, and neglect towards parents.

The duties to love, respect, obey, and help are grave obligations, and sins opposed to these duties are mortal in nature when the matter is serious.

Love

We should love our parents because it is to them, next to God, that we are indebted for our existence and the countless blessings which we enjoy.

We should love our parents not only with natural love, but with supernatural love. We should love our parents in God and for God. We should be sensible to their well-being, and wish for them and do for them all the good that we can.

Sins against love towards parents include: not showing them marks of affection, talking about them uncharitably, provoking them, not caring for them in their need, and wishing them evil.

Respect

We must respect our parents because they are representatives of God. Children show respect towards their parents by showing marks of respect, and by accepting their correction willingly.

Sins against respect towards parents include: speaking unkindly to or about them, striking or insulting them, and being ashamed of them.

Obey

We should obey our parents because they hold the place of God, Who has commissioned them to take charge of us.

Bishop Louis LaRavoire Morrow, author of My Catholic Faith, wrote, “A young child should obey his parents without question, complaint, or delay, just as he is told. He will show himself glad to obey.

“Older children may inquire about the reasons for certain commands, but they too should obey their parents in everything lawful. They will do what their parents wish, even before they are asked. They will obey willingly and promptly.”

“When a child is unwilling or ashamed to let his parents know about something, it is generally wrong.”

In things pertaining to morality and the salvation of our soul, our duty of obedience is perpetual. However, as regards the government of the family, obedience ceases when, after a certain age, or under certain conditions, determined by civil law, the children are emancipated from parental authority.

A son or daughter is not bound to obey the parents when they command something that is clearly against the commandments of God or of the Church, or when they unreasonably oppose the child’s vocation, because “obedience to God comes before obedience to men” (Acts 5:29).

Help

Justice and gratitude require us to help our parents in their corporal and spiritual needs. It is a serious obligation to care for one’s parents who are aged or in need.

We must not neglect the spiritual needs of parents. When parents are sick, children should call the priest to provide the sacraments. After their death, children should pray for them and have Masses offered for them.

Lawful superiors

One catechism states: “The fourth commandment does not only deal with the duties of children, but includes also the duties towards each other of parents and children, husband and wife, superiors and inferiors, masters and servants.”

The fourth commandment obliges us to respect and obey not only our parents, but also all our lawful superiors. This includes grandparents, guardians, teachers, employers, and legitimate civil and ecclesiastical authorities.

Parents have a serious duty to provide for the spiritual and bodily welfare of their children. They should begin early to give their children religious training.

Superiors, according to their varying degrees of responsibility, must care for those entrusted to them.

“And He went down with them and came to Nazareth and was subject to them” (Lk 2:51).

「天主十誡」中的第四誡是「孝敬父母」，命令我們要愛、尊敬、服從和幫助父母，禁止我們蔑視、不敬、忤逆和忽略父母。我們有絕對責任去愛、尊敬、服從和幫助父母，否則便是罪，在嚴重事情上，更搆成犯大罪。

愛父母

我們要愛自己的父母，因為在天主之外，他們就是我們存活之源、蒙福之由。

我們不止於天性的本能去愛父母，也應因天主而在天主內愛他們，我們應該體貼他們，為他們的裨益竭盡所能。

待薄父母、敷衍父母，激怒他們，對他們所需置之不理，甚至敵視他們，均屬違返愛父母的罪。

尊敬父母

我們要尊敬父母，因為他們代表天主。兒女要表達對雙親尊敬之心，甘心領受他們的訓誨。

違反尊敬父母的罪，包括言談態度和內容的失敬、肢體上的衝擊、詛咒他們、以自己的父母為恥。

服從父母

父母代表天主，負有管束兒女的責任，因此，我們應該服從父母。

「祂就同他們下去，來到納匝肋，屬他們管轄。（路加福音2:51）」看！小耶穌也聽命於瑪利亞和若瑟。

「我的天主教信仰」作者，類斯.蒙諾主教寫道：「兒童要不猶疑地甘心服從父母，且不埋怨、不挑戰他們的吩咐。較年長的子女，為明白父母的命令，可以詢問他們有關的因由，對父母任何合法的命令，都應甘願和立即服從，滿全他們的意願。」

「當兒女對一些事情，感到要向父母隱瞞，或羞於向父母坦言，一般都是錯事。」

基本來說，有關道德及救靈的指引，子女終生都應服從父母。但有關管治家庭的指引，孩子應服從父母到長大成人而獨立為止。

假如父母的命令是違反了天主或聖教會的誡命 —— 特別當他們反對子女追隨聖召之時，兒女便不應服從，因為「聽天主的命勝過聽人的命。（宗徒大事錄5:29）」

幫助父母

出於公義與感恩，我們要幫助父母身心所需，特別在他們臨屆天年之齡。

當然，我們更不能忽視父母靈性上的需要，在他們病危時請神父給他們施行必要的聖事，在他們身故後，為他們靈魂祈禱和獻彌撒。

合法的上司

一本「天主教要理問答」指出：「第四誡不止命令兒女如何善待自己的父母，亦指令一些相互的彼此責任，包含父母對兒女、丈夫與妻子、上司與下屬、僱主與聘僕等。」

除了對父母外，第四誡要我們尊重和服從祖父母、監護人、老師、僱主、正確的法律、聖職人員等合法的上司。

上司應按自己的權責，履行必要的責任，在不同程度上關顧下屬。自然地，父母也有必然的責任，照顧子女身與靈的需要，盡早給他們提供宗教教育。